


Secret Identities

by MiddleNameIgnominy



Series: Making the Septiplier Fanbase Look Bad [2]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Bestiality, I'm Sorry, Joke Fic, M/M, Septiplier - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-21
Packaged: 2018-08-10 03:40:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7829071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiddleNameIgnominy/pseuds/MiddleNameIgnominy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"......I thought you were dead, Harambe!"<br/>Warning: This is seriously messed up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Secret Identities

Jack sat nervously, awaiting Mark's explanation as to why he brought him to his hotel room after PAX was as exhausting as it had been.  
"So, Jack," he began  
"Yeah?"  
"We're really close friends, right?"  
"Yeah. What's wrong?"  
"Huh? Nothing's "wrong" per se..."  
"Let me guess: you're a prostitute in need of real love and affection, instead of meaningless words and touches that secretly make you feel dirty for committing something so serious with anyone that's got money?"  
"..........No...?"  
"Well then perhaps you're being held hostage by ISIS and being forced to make videos and act like everything's okay, while you're actually spending most of your time chained to a radiator in perpetual darkness."  
"Where the hell did that come from?!"  
"My spank bank."  
"Well, I can assure you that's not the case."  
"Maybe you're-"  
"I'M KEEMSTAR!"  
"....................What?"  
Mark pulled off a mask Jack didn't know he was wearing to reveal the fact that he was, in fact, Daniel Keem. Jack began to tear up.  
"P-please don't cry, Jack..."  
"There-There's something I need to tell you, too." he choked out.  
"What's that?"  
Daniel watched as Jack slipped off his own mask.  
"No..."  
"Yes."  
"......I thought you were dead, Harambe!"  
"I'm not dead. I will never be dead. I will be with you forever."  
They both cried on each other's shoulders. Daniel suddenly noticed something stuck in his beard. When he retrieved it, he saw that it was a wedding ring.  
"Will you marry me, Keemstar?"  
"Of course, Harambe!"  
"...So..."  
"Yeah?"  
"Do you wanna fuck?"  
"Yes."  
"Welp, you know what they say."  
"They say a lot of things, dude."  
"Dicks out for Harambe!"  
With that, Harambe groped Daniel's D-train and began jiggling it vigorously, to which he responded by making sinful gnome noises. He soon came with a breathy "i'm your host, killer cumstaaaarrrr, leeeeet's get rrooooiiiiigghht into the climax!". It was immediately after this that Harambe whipped out his cock. Daniel noticed that it looked more like that of a human than that of a gorilla, and he commented on it.  
"That's because... well... I have something to say."  
"Yeah?"  
Harambe took off yet another mask to reveal that he was actually just Jack all along.  
"Whoa... well, I guess there's no hiding my true identity." Mark said, slipping off his Keemstar mask.  
"Knew it!"  
"Ye."  
"Wanna fuck some more?"  
"Fist me daddy."  
They boned. The end.

**Author's Note:**

> *in Justin Bieber's voice* "Is it too late to say sorry? 'Cause I'm missing more than your respect."


End file.
